he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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