How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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