tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Mom said you looked used
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
We are all done wearing pants today
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
