CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
