Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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