I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Randomize
