I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
