i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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