yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
