here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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