You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
How naked do you want me to be?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
