This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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