I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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