Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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