Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
it's like iHOP with fire
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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