There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
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