I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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