And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
