ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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