I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
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