I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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