By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
