sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
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