It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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