Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize