the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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