Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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