people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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