PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Randomize
