is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
How's work?
Spinning.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
