You really coming over, don't trick.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
