More tranny stories later!
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize