And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize
