you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
