Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
His hands were made for my vagina.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
