But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
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