remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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