So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Randomize
