$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
