Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize