He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
