The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
