and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
