the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
