He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
