Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
