his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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