Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
