even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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