im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Randomize
